This is a very simple suggestion but works wonders. In my own life and in other people’s life I have observed that people struggling with depression often have nothing to look forward to. I often get down when all can see ahead of me is the mundane day to day routine of my life. Even though I love my life I can still get depressed by the routine of it all. Waking up in the morning, only to face yet another dirty nappy or a mountain of dishes that somehow seem to pile up – no matter how many times a day I stand at the sink washing up – somehow doesn’t always excite me. Breakfast, lunch, supper – as usual! Then there’s people needing urgent assistance with something or other yet again. It’s not that I don’t care it’s just that sometimes my heart does grow weary and cold. The way I keep fresh and avoid getting really depressed is I make hope 🙂 I put something in my near future that I will love doing, something that creates excitement and expectation. At least once a year it’s a holiday and then also occasionally a weekend away. Other times it’s a visit with a friend I haven’t seen in ages or perhaps even just a day out with my lovely daughters. This really helps keep my life more interesting.
When suffering with depression, the last thing you have the energy for is planning something. I have devised a plan to beat this. What I have done is found a lovely place that we always go to for a rest. Every year it’s the same place and we all know that its purpose is for a good rest and we love it! No need to scout for a new location, no need to spend hours trawling through spots on the Internet. Outlook has the booking lady’s email address and all I have to do is send one email and ask if the date is available and then it’s all done. No fuss and no hours or research and planning. Within minutes a nice restful holiday is booked and I can sit back and start thinking about how much fun it is going be so that the excitement and expectation can start building up! I do love exploring new places and when I am in a good place I might research somewhere new just for fun or something new to do, but if I am run down (which hopefully I can avoid now after reading these depression solutions in my book ha ha) I go somewhere or do something that doesn’t take much energy or planning. Keeping something fun in the not too distant future always helps me.
It is essential to understand what makes you tick! Perhaps booking a hairdresser appointment on a regular basis gives you hope or having a manicure once a month. Explore new things to find out more about yourself, try an art class or join a kickboxing club. I don’t know you but you do and so do people close to you. If you really aren’t sure what to do ask your friends and family what they think – you might be surprised about what they suggest or even how they perceive you.
Eric and I have weekly date night. No matter how hectic our weeks are we always have this night off to hope for. Usually it’s just a night at the cinema where we can switch off and escape into a fantasy world or a meal out where we can chat and have fun together. Other nights are nights at home where we sit by the fireplace and play scrabble. Our date nights are very simple and inexpensive but they are one of the things that we look forward to every week. I can’t tell you how much this has helped us through some very rough patches and also how this has helped us keep our marriage balanced.
I will stop here but chapter 5 does continue, for full details about this book please go here